Extra 5. Spring - Summer 2016
In September 2015, Jiang Xi received a gift.
She opened the simply designed white box. Inside was a white stylus, the newly released iPencil. Three characters were engraved on the body of the pen: “ru you shen.”
(ru you shen (如有神): literally “as if guided by a spirit”)
To gift her a “brush as if guided by a spirit.”
To wish that her brush would be “as if guided by a spirit.”
At that time, Jiang Xi had already passed her academic proficiency exams and was fully preparing for the art exams and the college entrance examination the following year.
Xu Cheng reorganized and redecorated the balcony, setting aside her workbench, desk, and painting area.
Jiang Xi’s painting time increased greatly. Her concentration was strong, often going for hours without interruption. Xu Cheng naturally took on all the housework, including picking up and dropping off Jiang Tian.
Day after day, Jiang Xi sat among a riot of colors, sketching, painting in oils, doing assignments. He took Jiang Tian to school, went to work, picked Jiang Tian up, bought groceries, stayed busy in the kitchen.
Unconsciously, Jiang Xi would hear the sound of his footsteps coming and going, smell the fragrance of food from the kitchen. When he came to the balcony to hang the laundry, she would hear the snap of fabric shaken out, the soft pa pa of cloth striking the air, and catch the rich, clean scent of laundry detergent, all of it carrying the smell of home.
As he passed by, he would touch her head, kiss her cheek.
Whenever Xu Cheng finished the household chores, he would move a stool behind her, wrap an arm around her waist, rest his chin on her shoulder, and watch her paint stroke by stroke.
Or he would half-recline on the sofa nearby, reading. As he read, the book would slip aside, and he would gaze at her profile for a long time as she painted.
He watched her when she painted, focused, serious. He also watched her brush and canvas, sharp, spirited, delicate.
Days like this passed one after another, sunrise and sunset, a solid, tangible kind of goodness.
Xu Cheng liked cacti. When he lived alone before, he only kept two or three pots. Now that there was someone at home, more and more gradually appeared on the balcony. Some he bought himself, some Jiang Xi picked up along the way for him. Round, paddle-shaped, columnar, all kinds.
Jiang Xi liked those cacti too. She felt they were like Xu Cheng. Covered in spines at a glance, yet soft to the touch, steady and resilient.
By the spring of 2016, a small flowerpot appeared on the balcony. Inside, a piece of ginger had been planted.
Before Lunar New Year’s Eve in 2016, Xu Cheng, Jiang Xi, and Jiang Tian spent the New Year in Yucheng. The three of them wandered through the wet market, buying ingredients for the reunion dinner. Xu Cheng unexpectedly found a very small piece of ginger, tender and cute, and thought it novel, deliberately picking it out and holding it up for Jiang Xi to see.
Jiang Xi was delighted too. “I’ve never seen such a small piece of ginger. It’s a jiang baobao!”
“Jiang baobao?” Xu Cheng echoed, then said, “That’s you.”
“Huh?”
“You’re Xiao Jiang. Aren’t you jiang baobao?”
“So cute.” Jiang Xi burst into laughter. Naturally, that little piece of ginger was brought home.
Jiang Xi forgot about it as soon as they got back. As they prepared the reunion dinner together, she cleaned the ingredients, and the little ginger got mixed in among them. Xu Cheng, sharp-eyed, scooped it out in one motion and said, “How can you eat my jiang baobao?”
Jiang Xi said, “Fine, let it live. We’ll put it in the fridge as a souvenir.”
But Xu Cheng found a porcelain cup, moved some soil from a flowerpot, and planted that little baby ginger in it.
From 2015 to 2016, winter in Yucheng was especially cold, wave after wave of cold fronts arriving. On New Year’s Eve, it even snowed heavily, a rare sight. Jiang Xi curled up on the sofa with Xu Cheng and Tiantian, warming themselves by the heater, watching the Spring Festival Gala. She looked out at the white snow, at the red paper-cut decorations on the window, at the colorful easel on the balcony, the green cacti, and felt a deep warmth.
At night, they fell asleep in each other’s arms. Nestled in Xu Cheng’s furnace-like embrace, she realized that every night of that entire winter had been warm.
She was no longer afraid of the cold.
As soon as spring arrived, the ginger sprouted.
Green, upright, with long, graceful leaves, growing taller section by section, like bamboo.
Xu Cheng marveled, “See? I told you it’s you. It looks exactly like you.”
Jiang Xi said, “It’s so beautiful, so fresh.”
“You’re even more beautiful, even fresher.”
He liked that ginger plant very much. He watered the cacti carelessly, but showed particular fondness for the ginger, touching its leaves as if patting a head.
Once, when he was again patting the little ginger plant’s “head,” Jiang Xi suddenly said, “Have I been too busy lately? I hardly spend time with you.”
He didn’t feel that way at all, but since she said it, he immediately took advantage. He dropped onto the sofa in one smooth motion, wrapped both arms around her waist, and sighed theatrically, humming, “Work’s been so tiring lately. I need a hug. You haven’t hugged me for days, I don’t even have any strength left.”
He said, “You need to recharge me.”
Jiang Xi’s heart softened at once. She hurried to hug him, patting his back. After a few seconds, she came to her senses and protested, “Xu Cheng, are you playing me? I clearly hugged you this morning!”
“A goodbye hug before going out doesn’t count.”
“Oh…” Jiang Xi said softly, then argued, “I hugged you last night too!”
“A welcome home hug doesn’t count. A goodnight hug in bed doesn’t count.”
“Oh…” Jiang Xi’s voice grew even softer. “Then it’s my fault. It’s because the gaokao countdown has started. But I promise, from now on I’ll hug you more every day.”
That day was Saturday. The two of them decided on a whim to go out shopping. They hadn’t planned anything, but as they wandered, the number of bags in their hands kept increasing.
Xu Cheng said summer was coming again, time for new clothes, and bought her a pile of new tops and dresses. When they passed an arcade with a claw machine, they played a few rounds, and added several more My Melody dolls.
Jiang Xi liked My Melody. She liked every new style and design. More than half of the bay window in the master bedroom was piled with them. Xu Cheng even had cabinets installed there specially, making space to store all her big-eared pink rabbits.
As they came out of the toy shop, Xu Cheng said, “Shanghai Disneyland is about to open. After your gaokao, we’ll go to Disneyland.”
Jiang Xi was delighted, and asked, “You have vacation time?”
“Yes.”
Xu Cheng was not from Yucheng. Jiangzhou was in the neighboring province. Every year he had a long family leave, though he had never used it. Now that he had family, he would make sure to use all of it.
“My Melody isn’t from Disney,” Jiang Xi said. “But I also really like StellaLou! I liked her when I was little. She’s a very cute rabbit too. When we go to Disneyland, I want to buy StellaLou.”
Xu Cheng remembered that in her large bedroom in the small west building, there was a big display cabinet filled with all kinds of plush toys, mostly My Melody, with some StellaLou among them.
He said, “Then I’ll get a Gelatoni.”
Jiang Xi’s face lit up, surprised. “You actually know Gelatoni?”
“How would I not? StellaLou’s boyfriend.” He added, frowning, “Why doesn’t My Melody have a boyfriend? …I’ve always said it’s a silly rabbit, can’t even manage a relationship.”
Jiang Xi laughed until her eyes curved like crescents.
They passed through the snack street. Jiang Xi looked left and right. She had been busy preparing for the gaokao and hadn’t gone out in a long time. Everything she saw, she wanted to eat, yet worried she couldn’t finish it. Xu Cheng still said the same thing: “If you can’t finish it, I will.” Letting her buy anything she wanted to try.
The two of them carried a pile of snacks to the riverside, sat along the high walkway, and looked out over the water. In April and May, Yucheng was in full bloom.
Jiang Xi had a small appetite but greedy eyes. Bingfen, mihuatang, steamed rice cake, beef jerky, fried intestines… she could only eat a little of each. Xu Cheng, on the other hand, had a good appetite. Whatever she handed him, he ate.
Jiang Xi couldn’t help laughing.
He was puzzled. “What?”
“A long time ago, when I had just boarded the boat, we were eating tangyuan. You ate the bowl I didn’t want. I was stunned at the time. It felt so intimate.”
Xu Cheng didn’t quite remember it. He raised a brow. “Did I?”
“Yes. But the one I had already taken a bite from, you threw away.”
Xu Cheng couldn’t help laughing then. It did feel like something his younger self would have done.
The river wind came up along the hillside, stirring the treetops, reaching them.
“Jiang Xi, was I very bad to you before?”
Jiang Xi had just taken a bite of a peach pastry and paused. “No. You were very good to me. Back in Jiangzhou, you always took me out shopping and playing. Just like now, buying lots of little things, eating many snacks I’d never tried. Malatang, hotpot, I all learned from you. You even took me to play billiards, ride bumper cars. You rode a motorcycle and took me along the river too.”
“I always felt I treated you pretty badly back then. Luckily, not too badly.”
“If you were really that bad, I wouldn’t have liked you. I’m not stupid.”
He kissed her hair.
A rare leisurely weekend. At the turn of spring and summer, the air was clear, the sun high. They sat by the river, chatting idly. He told jokes about his colleagues. She talked about amusing things she observed while sketching outdoors. They talked until the sun set.
Her feet hurt easily when going down stairs. He always carried her down.
Jiang Xi naturally waited for him to pick her up. He walked down along the path. On the mountain opposite, a temple roof gleamed gold. Jiang Xi looked at it a few more times and said, “The temple tucked among the trees looks quite nice. Yucheng has a lot of temples and Daoist shrines.”
Xu Cheng knew she believed in these things and asked, “Do you want to go pray?”
“Mm. Before the gaokao, to pray for things to go smoothly.”
Xu Cheng didn’t answer, focusing on the steps under his feet. After all, he was carrying her. A fall would not be trivial.
Jiang Xi asked, “You still don’t believe at all? After all these years, not even a little change?”
Xu Cheng said, “I don’t believe.”
Jiang Xi thought of those “Jiang Xi, be safe” wishes and asked, “You’ve never prayed to gods or Buddhas?”
This time, Xu Cheng said nothing. He didn’t want to admit it, yet didn’t want to lie, so—“Hey, I think that mung bean ice cake earlier was really good. Let’s buy some more on the way back?”
Jiang Xi froze for a moment, then burst out laughing, wrapping her arms around his neck, trembling with laughter, unable to stop.
Xu Cheng was baffled. “Did someone hit your laugh point?”
She didn’t say anything, only giggled.
On the drive back, Jiang Xi picked up the topic again. “Don’t dismiss it. The Bodhisattva is really efficacious.”
Xu Cheng touched his nose, said nothing. He truly didn’t believe in these things, but he knew she did and didn’t want to judge or deny her faith. “If you want to go pray for your studies, I’ll go with you tomorrow morning. For this kind of thing, you have to go in the morning, right?”
“Okay. I’m just telling you, the Bodhisattva really is efficacious. Last year when you went missing, I made a wish to trade my lifespan for your safety, and then—”
With a sudden brake, Xu Cheng pulled the car to the roadside, staring at her in shock. “Why would you make that kind of wish?!”
Jiang Xi froze. Seeing that he was a little angry and not joking, she quickly tried to smooth things over. “Don’t you not believe? If you don’t believe, then it won’t work. Just pretend I didn’t say it.”
Xu Cheng said nothing. His expression turned somewhat grim. He restarted the car, but turned the wheel, heading straight toward Wuwang Temple.
As soon as the car stopped, he pulled Jiang Xi out. Finding her too slow, he lifted her and ran up the mountain, straight to the Bodhisattva.
Breathing hard, he tugged her, pointed at the statue. “Tell it it doesn’t count. Say it quickly!”
Jiang Xi found it funny.
He was truly anxious. “Say it, quickly!”
Seeing her stand still, Xu Cheng stepped forward, held her by the waist, bent her legs slightly, helping her kneel. “Say it.”
Jiang Xi also quieted. “How can something like that be taken back?”
Xu Cheng’s gaze turned cold. He didn’t care. Holding her waist, gently pressing her head, he bowed with her, knocking their foreheads down together, and said, “Use all the suffering we’ve already endured to offset it. Isn’t that enough? If it can’t tell right from wrong, if good and evil go unrewarded, why believe in it at all. Better to believe in ourselves.”
Jiang Xi froze for a moment. After a long while, she nodded lightly.
She withdrew that wish.
At the foot of the mountain, when Xu Cheng set her down, he pulled her into a tight embrace and said, “Jiang Xi, don’t ever make that kind of wish again. Your safety matters more than anything.”
Her eyes grew hot. She nodded hard.
After all that commotion, they returned late.
They picked up Jiang Tian from school and headed home.
Outside the residential compound, the long street was lively with neighborhood shops. Barbecue stalls had set up tables and chairs out on the sidewalk.
Jiang Xi glanced over. Xu Cheng said, “How about this? Let’s eat here. No need to cook tonight.”
Before Jiang Xi could answer, Jiang Tian in the back seat asked, “Eat what?”
“Barbecue.”
“Barbecue?” Jiang Tian said happily. “The last time I had barbecue was when you took my sister and me, Xu Cheng gege.”
That summer many years ago, when Xu Cheng got back late, he would sometimes take Jiang Xi and Jiang Tian out for barbecue. Jiang Xi couldn’t eat spicy food but wanted to try, and each time ended up with tears in her eyes from the heat.
In fact, after the two of them got together, they often slipped out in the middle of the night for barbecue after sleeping for a while. Unfortunately, the timing was always “off,” and Jiang Tian would be fast asleep.
At this moment, when Jiang Tian mentioned it, the two of them met each other’s eyes in the rearview mirror and couldn’t help laughing.
The spring–summer weather was good. Jiang Xi said she wanted to sit outside.
The sidewalk along the row of shops was wide, shaded by lush trees. Beneath them was a line of tables, with half the path left open for passersby.
Xu Cheng handed the menu and a pencil to Jiang Xi. She shifted her chair closer to Jiang Tian and looked together with him. “What do you want to eat?”
“Beef skewers,” Jiang Tian said. “Lots of beef skewers.”
Jiang Tian’s tastes were simple. Jiang Xi ticked off a few things he would eat, then moved her chair again, coming over to Xu Cheng. “What about you?”
She nudged him with her elbow.
Xu Cheng lowered his gaze, looking at her face so close at hand, then at the items she had marked for Jiang Tian on the menu, and said softly, “I want you to choose for me too.”
Jiang Xi: “……”
Was this some kind of perk?
She shot him a strange look and muttered, “You idiot.”
He hooked an arm around her waist, rested his chin on her shoulder, his voice low by her ear. “You pick.”
Jiang Xi’s ears tingled. She chose a few things he liked, then added three cans of iced cola.
Soon, the barbecue was served, sprinkled with sesame seeds and chopped scallions, enticing.
Jiang Tian ate happily, devouring everything. Seeing this, Xu Cheng said, “We should bring you out to eat more often…” He glanced at Jiang Xi with a smile, then added, “If you can wake up at midnight, Tiantian.”
“Oh…”
Xu Cheng took a bite of a chicken wing and noticed a fast-food box meal shop across the street, where many nearby workers were having their meals. He nudged her. “Hey, I think you’ve painted something like that.”
Jiang Xi looked over. “What I painted was a bit more toward the bottom layer.”
Xu Cheng had seen every painting Jiang Xi had done. She had painted all kinds of people: boatmen, laborers, drivers, sand diggers, dockworkers, and more.
He knew those were the sum of her endless experiences over the years.
“Actually, the food at migrant workers’ canteens is pretty good…” Jiang Xi recalled the past and said, “good and cheap. For a little over ten yuan, you get a big bowl of rice, and it’s not just pickles. There’s chicken, there’s meat, and the portions aren’t small. If you’re doing physical labor, you can’t manage without meat. If the shop owner is too stingy, they can’t keep the business going. There’s fruit too, cherry tomatoes, bananas, apples, all the cheapest kinds, but filling.
I realized very early on that the world is layered. Each layer of people has their own way of living, their own way to survive, their own kind of happiness. It’s fascinating.
You must see a lot of that in your work too, right?”
“Mm…” Xu Cheng looked at her, his gaze so dense it was almost impossible to dissolve.
Jiang Xi paused, touched her face. “Did I get scallions on my face?”
“No.” He smiled. “I was just thinking, how is it that Ms. Jiang Xi is so charming?”
So charming he was completely captivated, and often filled with admiration.
Jiang Xi froze, her face flushing red all at once, confused. “You… what did I do? Did you drink cola or alcohol?”
She leaned in to check his can. Taking advantage, he laughed and bit lightly at her cheek.
“……” Jiang Tian frowned and silently turned his head away.
Jiang Xi’s face grew even redder. Embarrassed, she pinched his thigh: people from the neighborhood were all around!
Night had already fallen. The neighboring tables were filled, growing lively.
In front of the braised food shop next door, middle-aged and elderly people gathered to play xiangqi. Onlookers commented and pointed out moves.
The spring night was cool, and many people were out for a walk.
Across the street, in the flower shop, the proprietress was clearing away discarded stems and blooms.
As night deepened, there were fewer cars on the street. Occasionally, a bus passed with only a handful of passengers, red numbers glowing on its display.
Those getting off either headed straight into the residential compound, or stopped by neighborhood shops to buy pastries, snacks, daily necessities, or wandered into convenience stores and flower shops for a while.
Jiang Xi ate barbecue, drank cola, listening as Jiang Tian chatted with Xu Cheng about the school band.
She lifted her head and saw the dark green canopy above, like an umbrella, set against the ink-dark spring night sky.
People came and went all around. In the air lingered the mingled scents of barbecue, seafood, sauces, cakes, plastic, fresh flowers, a dense breath of everyday life.
One small shop after another, convenient, modest, plain, wove together into this corner of Yucheng’s bustling city, forming its quiet, earthly warmth.
She gazed at the street for a long time, and suddenly realized that this kind of ordinary safety, simple happiness, had long since been like the can of cola in her hand, cool and damp, solidly held in her palm.
As she quietly felt this moment, in the corner of her vision she noticed that Xu Cheng, too, had been looking at her for a long time.
She turned her eyes and met his calm brows and gaze, enduring, deep as night.
And in the instant their eyes met, she knew that what she felt was also what lay in his heart.
Very soon, the gaokao approached.
On the 7th, Xu Cheng got up early to take Jiang Xi to the exam site. On the way, he asked, “Nervous?”
She shook her head briskly. “Not nervous.”
“Really?”
She clenched her fist. “Mm. If I don’t pass, I’ll just try harder next time.”
Xu Cheng paused, then quickly laughed. “Alright. I’ll be with you.”
After finishing the first subject, Chinese, Jiang Xi came out and saw Xu Cheng among the crowd of parents waiting for their children, looking at her from afar, raising a hand toward her.
Delighted, she rushed over. “Why are you waiting here?”
Xu Cheng caught her, pulling her into his arms, smiling. “Other examinees all have family picking them up. Of course you should have someone too.”
Jiang Xi looked up. “Really? I never went to high school, I didn’t know about this kind of ritual. Did someone pick you up after your gaokao?”
“No. Whether someone came or not didn’t matter, it’s not a big thing,” he said. “But I just want to be here for you.”
For every subject after that, he waited outside the exam site.
Until the last exam ended, Jiang Xi walked out of the school, and Xu Cheng held a large bouquet of roses, welcoming her victory.
The bouquet was huge, filling her arms, fragrant.
That summer, Jiang Xi and Xu Cheng went to Shanghai Disneyland, and also made a trip to Wuzhen along the way.
Not long after, the results came out. She was admitted to an art academy.
She was going to university.
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